HI everyone,

I'm new to this.  I don't have many friends in my area with young daughters (9 & 10) and I need others' opinions.  I received a notice that the 4th grade girls would be having a class with the school district nurse to talk about menstruation.  I really object to this mainly because I now am on their time schedule as far as when to talk to my 10yr old about her period.  I had been thinking about it recently and decided it was time (she just turned 10)..but  now I am forced to do it in the next week because I don't want her to learn about from school and I want her to be prepared for "the class".  I think  this type of instruction is more appropriate in 5th grade at the earliest!  There is a whole range of development in her class...and if the school is concerned they could have sent a letter home offering the nurse's services in speaking to a girl with or without her parent....then have a grade wide class in 5th grade.

   Am I way off base here?  I just think the school has overstepped their bounds by deciding when my daughter should be told about menstruation. 

  I plan on  providing my daughter with all the information I can over the course of her teen years.  I am well aware that knowledge of the facts is the best thing I can give her to prevent pregnancy and disease.

   I just don't agree that the school should decide that   every girl in 4th grade  should  know exactly what menstruation is...whether or not the girl is ready for it or not.

    All of the girls were called into the hallway and informed by their teacher (a man) that they would be having this class in two weeks.

So...am I wrong to object?  Does anyone agree that it is more appropriate for 5th grade?

Thank-you...and I'm looking forward to being a part of "Mommytalk"

Ann 

Ann I would be upset to that they didn't send home a note.  Schools say they want parent/teachers relations so they should be up front about all sexual education.  It is sad though that there are not more parents like you- who talk to there kids about this stuff.  Talk to the school and the teacher voice your objection- come up with a plan of action for your daughter.  the other thing for whatever reason girls are starting their menstration cycle earlier and earlier so it doesn't suprise me that the school are starting these talks earlier and earlier. 

I would make a point of saying to how inappropriate is was to one call the girls out in the hall and have a MALE teacher inform them- not a good start to the girls education- if I was that young I think I would feel like it was secretive and a woman might be a bit more sensitive.

Ann,

I can totally understand where you are coming from... and kudos to you for being so concerned.

Thing is not ever parent is so intouch and would rather or not tell their child about such things... So think of it as a benifit to the girls whos parents dont know how to talk to them.

I remember in the fifth grade our teacher kicked the boys out to tell us a lil about it... to tell us if anything weird happened to let her know and she could help us out.

My dear husbands little sister started in the 4th grade too so it does happen.

I think you should be able to opt out... you know send a note saying No i wouldnt like my child to attend that class. maybe you can keep her homethat day and have a fun girl day where you can educate her all about the facts of life... good luck

OK When I was young I was cramping and at first blood PETRIFIED!!! No Classes back then... My own girls  brought notes in grade school and I opted out as I taught them myself, dont remember exactly what grades...but I did allow feminine hygeine in middle school.... all sex ed NOT ... I taught my OWN  kids and still glad I did... Despite todays casual attitudes about  bodily functions, sex, etc  there are still a multitude of parents who, for whatever reasons wont teach kids personal stuff and for me thats why classes still necessary ... as girls often start tween 10 and 11, (KNEW A GIRL STARTED AT 9), i dont think its a bad age to start preparing them.

I agree with what the others have said.  I completely agree that the school should notify parents ahead of time about this by sending home a note.  Also, if you do not feel comfortable having your daughter in class for that then you should keep her home to have a fun and relaxed talk about it.  I think that parents definitely have the right to decide whether or not to have their child participate in this type of education in school.  However, like others have said, there are a lot of parents who do not take any time to talk to their kids about this at all (and it can be a very scary thing if you don't have any information) and girls are starting earlier all the time.  So I guess I don't necessarily think that 4th grade is too early to talk about it, but parents should be informed and given the option.

"I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples.  For great is your love, reaching to the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies.  Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; let your glory be over all the earth." -Psalm 57:9-11. 

 

glitter-graphics.com ...

Ok, it's my understanding that the school did send a note home about the class and that Ann wanted more of note about the parents could address the issue at home.  So I don't think the school did anything wrong in that aspect because the parents were notified.  I don't agree with having a male teacher involved though, even if it was only to inform them that it was an upcoming class. 

I do think it needs to be taught at school for the simple fact that as someone already said, not all parents will bother.  I think it was around this age that it was taught to us.  I don't think it's too early because some girls will be dealing with this very soon.  Having a little time to "digest" the information before they start their period may make the transition a little easier.

I also don't think it's a good idea to let your daughter skip the class.  With so much peer pressure out there, she may get some grief from it.  She may also get the information second hand from some of her friends and it comes across incorrectly.  If you are really concerned, maybe you could talk to the school and get any teaching material ahead of time.  You could go over it with your daughter before the class and add anything you see necessary.  Also encourage her to come to you with any questions after the class. 

Good luck.  Let us know how it goes.  And oh yeah, welcome to mommytalk!!

My daughter just went thru Sex Ed for a few days this year. I think its best sometimes for the school to do it but with our permission cause Im pretty sure the kids these days know EVERYTHING already. They hear things from thier friends. I think that it would be best as a supplement to learn from school after what you tell your child.  Also there are some kids out there like ME who didnt want to hear it from thier parents! I was embarrassed to hear my Mom talk about sex so I would walk away. She would shove Christian related sex books under my door. Sometimes theyd rather hear it from someone other then thier parents.

 

we had the class in 5th and 6th grade a note was sent home that had to be signed by a parent for us to participate, i went to both. in 6th grade i had a male teacher he was an odd one, he thought the boys should have to go through the class to so they knew about it. guess he didnt get that if the boys knew more about it it would just lead to more teasing of the girls over it hehe.

Hannah went through this and the school sent home a note/permission slip.  You have a right if you choose not to send your daughter.  However, I let Hannah go, she learned the medical/technical side of it, and then she came home and we had a great talk!  I think it is best to talk after they hear all the technical stuff, as they may be confused with what all they hear at the session. 

I was not upset by this class at all - I welcomed it.  I had mine back in 5th grade and that was in the early 80's, so they are still targeting hte same age groups. 

My daughter already has 5 girls in her glass that have started their period - no warning, no talks prior - one poor girl thought she was dying and was at the movies with her sister and wearing white capri's.  This brought on some questions from Hannah, but hearing it from a nurse, at least that is who comes in at our school district, is much better.

 

Thank you to everyone for the feedback.   I'm sorry if I didn't make it clear that the school did send a note home.

I don't disagree with the idea of teaching about it in school...I just thought it would be more appropriate in 5th or 6th grade.  I think the school is assuming alot to think that every 4th grader should be informed about it.  They took the "timing of the talk" out of my hands and put it on their schedule.   After I tell my daughter the facts, she can decide if she wants to go to the class...I wouldn't keep her out of it..even if I preferred she didn't go....she would feel like an outcast.  If SHE  wants to skip the class..thats ok.

I just feel that sometimes the school thinks that they are the parents.  Educators have an  important role in a child's life..but I'm still the parent!  When they overstep their bounds, the parent is unfairly placed in a position to object...and possibly have their child feel the consequences...or just accept that the school has taken over some issues as the parent.  Obviously, it depends on the issue to decide which route to take.

I apologize for the tirade.  I'm not trying to make a mountain out of a molehill.  I guess I just wondered if others thought my objections were justified.  thanks again!

Ann