My daughter is 19 months old. I am starting to think that I might be ready for a second baby in the future....for those of you who have two or more, is adding another child to the family as huge of an adjustment as having the first child? I love the idea of my daughter having a sibling and a playmate, but I just remember how hard it was when she was a newborn, and the thought of having her PLUS a newborn seems so daunting. So....is having a second one a breeze compared to the first one, or double trouble? :-))

Having 2 will only be as hard as you make it.  I believe if you tell yourself itsgoing to be you will have trouble.  Babies are totally different.  My first was very easy and my second was tough, but my daughter was 3 when my son came and she helped so much.  My advice would just be take it one day at a time.  Let your older child be apart.  we included my daughter in everything, it was her baby too.  And you will find away that works for you.  It doesn't have to be hard. I enjoyed every bit of it.  Now I have 3, a 7 yr old, a 4 yr old and a 1 yr old.  I love they way they play and interact with each other, its amazing!!!

My first one was 2 1/2  when I had my second. My second was not at all planned so I was majorly scared about it, I had planned on my first being atleast 5 before we had another, but it is amazing at how the second one just fits in and is just part of life. Yes there are days that it is harder, but there were days that having just one was hard. What the said earlier about the letting the older take part. I think is about the best advice. So I guess to answer question, I don't think it is harder, I think that it just becomes the "new" normal.

My first 2 are 23 months apart and middle and last one is 20 months apart.  I found it to be no more difficult - you put more items in the diaper bag.  But having a small one already-  you are more than likely always preparred.  Boy or Girl - you need them involved in the pregnancy and I got mine a doll to help show tham how tiny the baby would be and how to help mommy hold it and feed it, etc. 

When they were babies- no issues - it is them older that is the problem- HEHE!

However, I would not have done one thing differently, they fight, the bicker, they argue - but let the chips be down and the other 2 are right there for the other one - whether it be a shoulder to lean on, a hug, or a what did you do to my bro/sis - they are there for one another!

 

I found, personally, that with baby #2, I just needed more time to do things.  It took me a little longer to get everybody ready, a little longer to feed them, and if I had an appointment, I started getting ready a little earlier so that I would have enough time to get myself and both of my babies ready.

When I had baby #3 & #4, piece of cake.  Maybe it was just because I was more mature and more comfortable in my role as a mom, but it just seemed so much easier.  Also, I knew what to expect, what worked best, and I had a great routine in place.  These things helped me tremendously.

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my sisters and i were all 2 yrs apart and made it easier for being friends as kids mine were 5 yrs apart and while there were advantages   and they are best friends today  i still wish  i coulda had em closer. my grans are like lil oer a yr apart and thought that would be awful hard  but they are so fun together  and really easier than id have imagined.... so go for it when you feel time is right

I guess I can't give you an honest answer because I went from one child...to 3 children...and they were 6 years apart.  I can tell you that it was a bit hard to get use to sharing my time and loving equally all 3 of them.  I should say that having twins didn't get hard until they became mobile...I would say that if havin another child is what you want then go for it.  You carry your child for 9 months (or so) then for a few months they just take a bit more of mom and dads time feeding changing cuddling..but really not much time is taken away from your first child...in my opinion...of course the newborn is just watching what you do with your oldest child. Mom and Dad may be tired...but bouncy chairs baby slings regular swings floor time....and well just in your arms wont take away time from your oldest child.  My oldest son was 6 when the twins were born...we tried and had many problems in between so Our son was a great big helper and enjoyed the  big brother role very much.  I think WISDOM is something that makes any child after your first easier....Think of the many things you learned on the way with your first..think of the many new friends you have made that are mommies and daddies that will guide you and give advice.  Plus you have this wonderful website MOMMYTALK to ask any quesion.  We are built for this..we can handle stress we can gain courage deal with pain and with a smile and an open heart welcome more children into our lives.  For a women to go through hours..or minutes or labor screaming painful life changing time and in a second being overwelmed with love and joy of seeing your child...knowing what you created....we can handle it.....Having faith in yourself to get through it and being committed to doing it....sometimes it seems there is nothing we can't handle....but all of us as parents...make it happen learn from our moments gain wisdom and love with all of our heart......Have Fun in your adventure

My second one is 25 months younger than my first. It will be easier. Think about how stressed we are with our first babies -- how we jump at every sound, sterilize everything, etc. By the second one, you know what's important and what's not and you tend to be more relaxed with them. My son ended up being a better baby than my daughter (who was excellent herself) simply because he was secondary and my daughter was at an age where she needed a lot of attention (2-1/2).

My first two are 18 months apart and then my second and third are 20 months apart and I really like having them so close. If it's so unfortunate that I MUST go to the grocery store with all three of them people look at me like I'm insane, but other than that it's wonderful.

Some days it's incessant and by the time my husband gets home I am a little crazed. My house isn't spotless, my car's a mess, I haven't used a blow dryer or makeup in 2 years and I let them watch TV, but they're the BEST thing in the world and my girls mean so much to each other and the baby's just kind of along for the ride right now (which I do feel bad about).

My girls LOVE each other, they play so beautifully and if one of them is at my parent's house, or at preschool the other one asks the whole time when her sister will be back. They love the baby too, they will lay on the floor with him and talk to him and give him toys.

We're a little messy, but we're really happy...it's hard work, I've learned to simplify my life and be happy at home with the three of them.

Good luck! And in my experience, with the subsequent children that difficult newborn stage that seemed to last FOREVER with your first flies by. My baby is 5 months old now and I just don't know where the time went. 

i dont only have a son whos almost 7 months...but i wont mind having another baby...infact i would love it...i know how hard it is with newborns as i have recently been through the experience but i think second would be easier to handle cuz ure already an expert now...good luck

I agree that with the second, you tend to be more relaxed and have a better idea of what to expect, etc.  It does take a little more time to get everyone ready, but it's not a big deal.  And every baby is different.  Timothy actually was more difficult than Emma (who was the world's easiest baby) because he had several issues (jaundice, acid reflux, colic, etc) but I also had a lot more support in place with Timothy than I did with Emma.  And now they are both just happy and healthy and so much fun!  They have a blast together (sure they have their moments and fights, but nothing unusual).  And I definitely agree with having the older one as involved as you can.  Don't try to force them to participate, but always give them the option.  And most of all, relax!  If you want another one, it will be fine.  We have more than enough love and strength for them!

"I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples.  For great is your love, reaching to the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies.  Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; let your glory be over all the earth." -Psalm 57:9-11. 

 

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I have enjoyed reading the posts here!  I am prego with my second and they will be only 15 months apart.  We planned to have them close together and are no debating on having a third right after this one!  Man.. am I glutten for a tough three years or what!  Anyway.... good luck with your decision!!!

Everyone is different in the way that you handle things but I agree with a lot that was said.  You add more things to the diaper bag, you have to get up a little earlier to make sure you have enough time.  If you really involve your older child then it makes it much easier.  But one thing is easier...you have gone through it once before so you won't have all the same worries that you had the first time.